Memoirs Of The Unruly Middle Child That Ate The Choice Assorted Biscuits Before Christmas

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#HandsOffChoiceAssorted

Did you hear the story of the guy who broke the decade old age rule in the black community? Well the black society is governed by a lot of unwritten rules that have been in existence for years, some are unstated but that does not mean they don’t exist. As far the elders are concerned, they are legal and binding.

If you black enough you know table charm is off limits, the new blankets are reserved for visitors and you use the same plate until it breaks, don’t forget that Tennis biscuits are for visitors and Christmas is a day to bath in the morning and wear brand new clothes, but Christmas is more special than just a pair of brand new shoes and clothes in the black community; this is the day the family gets  to sit down together and have a massive meal that we have named 7 colours to honour its nature of having different potions of food dished at the same damn time!! Imagine eating pumpkin, potatoes, beetroot and beans at the same damn time, with rice and roasted chicken!! stop kidding me BRO!!

But after observing all this protocols and eating custards the main event unfolds and guess what, this guy just decided this year he will eat the sheep before the sacrifice, he decided to open the Choice assorted biscuits before the 25th of December!! you kidding me right??

This was the straw that broke the camel’s back I tell you!!

The opening and eating of the Choice Assorted Biscuits has in the past years become a bonding once in a while sacred treat ceremony in all black households. The biscuits are only bought in December to be opened during the 25th ONLY!! That is the reason why they stay hidden away in Mom’s room, safely put away in the cupboard.

So basically this guy chowed his family’s Christmas because he couldn’t sit still and observe protocol, how selfish can one be that they open the box and jump straight to chocolate? That is like the golden moment of the Golden moment. I hope he won’t be expelled from the household or have his clothes stashed because anyone who would dare eat choice assorted before the D day does not deserve Christmas! The most important thing we can learn from this experience is that, this December we need to observe protocol and most importantly swerve free off Choice assorted until the big day or might as well be the reason for a spoilt Christmas celebration.

We waited for so long for this Christmas let us not spoil it, from the Genius Level family I would like to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and a happy prosperous New Year. Remember to enjoy yourself safely. Hands off choice assorted till everyone is seated!!

Dimo Wa Moraswi Sekele

Senior writer for Genius Level, poet, serial activist and has Entrepreneurship as a career of choice. Self taught Videographer and photographer... Click on bottom link to see other articles I've written...

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