We Give To You The ‘O E BATLA KAE’ Survey Results and They LIT!!


So about a month ago we put out this ‘O E BATLA KAE’ survey to find out just exactly where do South Africans prefer or want it. What is that exactly that I refer to? Well it can be anything but in this case let’s let our tainted, innocence devoid minds take center stage. The results are here and as a social media fanatic would say… They are LIT!!

On an overall average, the above stats show that most as the song puts it, want it ko mokokotlong (back). This represents 45% of the people who took the survey and 18% are not having non of this! They want it in the bank account! (ques 21 Savage, “In my bank account, yeh, In my bank account, yeh, 21 – 21- 21 – 21, phew! phew! ***more random gun shots**). I assume they require monetary advances before it even gets to the mokokotlong part…  But that’s just my assumption. Where do you want it?

The above stats breaks down the initial results and places them into gender categories. As expected 58% of ladies want it ko mokokotlong… I’m gonna ignore the 42% of dudes that want it in a similar position. 21% of guys want it in their bank accounts and 79% of ladies also want it in their bank accounts. Seems like ladies do not want the missionary position anymore with only 14% of them suggesting they want it in the ‘front’ vs 89% of guys. Keep up fellas!!

Now we took it a step further and broke down the result by clan and gender. Afrikaans guys want it 100% in the bank account lol, dude! Ya’ll already have the land. All Ndebele, Shona and Venda guys want it ko mokokotlong… weird. 20% of Pedi dudes prefer it in the bank account and let me just mention that I’m Pedi and I fully agree! That’s where I want it. Seems Pedi guys like money; “Bomma ba rile ga ka tla Jozi go tlo bapala”.

67% of Tsonga ladies want it in the bank account, while only 44% of Xhosa ladies require it there… In this case the widely assumed reputation that most place upon them does not actually precede them. Interesting that 90% of Ndebele girls want it only ko mokokotlong… Take notes guys. English ladies seem to be the most adventurers and open minded with 60% of them saying they wouldn’t mind having in everywhere.

If we look at the survey results broken down by gender and province, we see that KZN ladies lead the way when it comes to the mokotlong preference, Northern Cape ladies lead the way when it comes to wanting it in monetary form. Gauteng ladies can be regarded as more adventurers and damn right down to a thrill with 20% of them saying they wouldn’t mind having it Everywhere. Shivers!! Austin Powers would say ***I think I just lost my mojo baby***

Not surprising with Pedi guys still leading the pack with requirements of receiving it in monetary terms. Our reputation for loving money precedes us with 33% of us wanting it in the bank account. Northern Cape guys strictly want it ko mokokotlong **side eye**. Gauteng males are somewhat more multifaceted with 4 categories fitting in their requirements.

Below please see further stats results broken down by age groups and gender. If I had to break it down intellectually I’d say this survey and the below stats indicating preferences by gender and age put you at an advantage! By analyzing this you will then be in the know of what your crush is more likely to prefer and that way you can use this effective analysis to equip thyself with the necessarily know-hows and better improve your selling statements the next time you decide to make a move on your crush. GOOD LUCK!!

By Flabo The UnAuthordox




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