I read “Think like a man and act like a lady” the contradiction in that book blocks the sun literally, so she is supposed to think like me and act differently. Look my thoughts primarily influence my actions, so thinking like me and acting differently defeat the purpose of thinking and reduces the whole thing to a mind game.
So we want to argue relationships and marriage are not the same thing? That is the problem we treat a marriage as a transition, we expect a marriage to work like a miracle, we expect it to turn a failing relationship in to a successful relationship. We expect and deliberate to be different people before and after marriage to which I want to ask, does it make sense? Why on earth would you marry a stranger? I say she/he is a stranger because apparently some (things) are reserved for the period after the wedding day (which is just a day to celebrate their marriage)
Marriage is defined as the legally or formally recognized union of a man and a women or partners. Where in that statement does it say the beginning? We want to look at a marriage as a goal in a relationship whilst we are achieving the goal of a relationship by successfully making the relationship work every single day. So now back to the book the women are supposed to hold back on sex just to get the ring, how did you reach that conclusion Steve?? You see once we reduce a relationship to its elements we are more likely to reach conclusions that are biased. At the end of the day we do not get into a relationship with people so that they can just clean after us, cook for us or sleep with us. But if you look at these elements individually you are going to understand the roles they play and exaggerates their roles in the relationship.
I am convinced a relationship and a marriage is the same damn thing, “boys shack and man marry” that is true Steve, boys take a different girl home every day and men stick to one women, the day a man decides to stick to one women and the women decides to stick to him is the day a successful relationship is born. So we cannot be fighting for recognition, we can’t even afford to strain a working relationship by the issue of a missing ring that won’t add value to the relationship, except in the case where there were reservations just to get the ring. Again I find the narrative that men are predators and women are supposedly the prey troubling, but that is a different topic even though to some extend informs my opinion that women have a role to play in a relationship.
I wish we can try to simplify life, the same way we always looking for technology to simplify our lives we should strive to unburden our social lives. A relationship is the union of 2 people and on the issue of legality please read the next piece.
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